Cella Dwella, Yo

After enduring 15-too-many spring training games on ESPN and countless corny Buster Olney and Tim Kurkjian jokes on prematurely-aired Baseball Tonight episodes, Opening Day 2011 is upon us. STOP! Before you assume this post will include my predictions for the season, you are wrong. Because it's not hard to predict a cellar-dwelling finish from the Mariners... again. However, Ichiro will be fun to watch steal bases and hit .330, and King Felix will be a joy to watch make hitters look foolish on that slider once every 5 days or so. It's hard to have an opinion on other teams from a Seattle standpoint, seeing as every other team in the league is better. Except for the Pittsburgh Pirates. It's just plain sad to see fans waving the Terrible Towel at Pirates games. Your baseball team is so bad that you have to implement another successful franchise's staple just to make the game seem relevant. Youch. But enough ragging on the Pirates. Like they need another doubter. I think I'm just looking for an outlet for all my depression that lies in the M's. But if I have learned one thing from Opening Day over the years, it's that every team gets a fresh start. Yep, we are currently tied with the fresh-from-a-World-Series Texas Rangers. Suuhhweeeeeeet! Whelp, back to reading about the October Revolution of 1917. If only the Mariner's offensive lineup had the fervor of the Bolsheviks. Damn.